Dianna, I sent you a private msg (I hope).

Teresa

My Dearest Bob,

Sweetie, what you are feeling IS normal.  This whole situation just goes against everything we were ever taught about being a parent.  Their whole lives we protected them...held their hand crossing the street, monitoring their whereabouts, making sure they're hangin' with the right crowd, don't run with with scissors or knives, don't throw rocks (you'll put your out  eye!).  We spend YEARS teaching them right from wrong.  We kissed their booboos when they were little, winced a bit when they got stitches or broke a bone.  Suddenly, seemingly overnight, they grew into men & went off to war.  Out of our reach.  Out of our sight.  Out of our control & our protection.  So of course you're going to do the what-ifs.  I would be concerned if you didn't.

As for whether or not you should view the upcoming piece, that is something that you must decide for yourself.  If you don't feel you can handle it, then don't watch...it's ok not to watch.  When I was a police officer, my mother used to listen to the goings-on on her scanner while I was on duty. She was glued to that radio, waiting to hear if something bad was gonna happen to me. I finally had to convince her that it was OK to not listen while I was working.  I bet Rick would tell you the very same thing.  You are not being a woos or disloyal by not watching.  Perhaps, during that time slot, you could use that same time to write him a letter.

Personally I think it's irresponsible journalism to show such things.  Don't they have any regard for the families?  It's just plain cruel.  Those reporters can get their point across without having to show them being shot at.  I'm really angry about that.

Bob, do whatever is comfortable for YOU.  This is an impossible situation but it is what it is.  Which ever way you go in your decision of to watch or not watch...no judgments.  No criticism.  You are a worried father & you should have to be subjected to any more trauma than is necessary.

I am sending Joshua Adams two boxes out today.  He has the same address as Penich had, so I wanted to send it there.  I sure hope they have some electricity because I'm sending a hot pot to boil water and a bunch of ramen noodles.  I also sent a bunch of Clif Bars (energy bars) and magazines (Sports Illustrated, ESPN,  Fitness & Training, and Maxim), styrofoam bowls, plastic forks and spoons, etc.  My mailman looks at me funny when he starts putting these magazines in my mailbox.  With all of us focusing on Korengal, we should be able to take care of them.  I'm now going to look for some fox river socks.

Teresa

Well gang...I sent in my comments.  Not sure everyone will like what I had to say though.

Basically, I thanked the reporter & his team for bringing to the foreground the plight of our valley boys.  But I also admonished him on being irresponsible in his reporting.  I said I didn't think it was necessary to be so graphic.  These families don't need to see their loved ones being shot at & they certainly didn't need to hear the screams of pain from those boys that got injured & killed.  Not EVERYTHING should be put on the screen for all to see.  After all, that was not a movie...that was REAL LIFE!  And those men had families watching!!  Even back during Viet Nam, when I was just a kid, even then I couldn't understand how the media could show dead & wounded soldiers on tv like that.  Am I the only one that feels this way?  Gosh, I hope not.  But then I'm not one to mistake sensationalism for journalism.  Don't worry...I didn't say anything about AS...didn't want to draw negative attention to such a worthy & important organization.  BTW, good job, Joanne for getting the plug in.  Sorry I'm so militant.

Bob,

Everything I have read about supporting soldiers says that those soldiers who had a support system in place during their deployment come home healthier in mind, body and spirit.  Please know we all have your son's back and the others in the Korengal.  They are in extraordinary circumstances, true, and no doubt will be changed forever by this experience.  But know that part of their experience is the outpouring of support, caring, love, letters, care packages, even equipment they need that the Army does not provide from total strangers, fellow Americans who SEE them, who GET what is going on, and who are willing to HELP.  I hope that offers some modicum of comfort to you and the other parents on here. 

WE WILL PRAY YOU AND YOUR SONS THROUGH THIS (Thanks, Phillis, for telling me this, now it is my mantra!)

I don't have any family deployed except for my 300 or so adopted ones and I have just exhausted myself emotionally lately watching these things, explaining their situation to possible donors, reading the posts here late at night and usually not even posting because it's just too much.  So Bob, it is totally understandable what you are going thru as a Dad, wish I could give you a big ole granny hug and help you feel a little better.  Do what you need to to take care of yourself so you can continue to be strong for Rick (also my son's name) now and when he comes home.  I know it's hard to watch and hard not to watch to see for yourself, I wish the reporters would take into account that loved ones are watching and show a little compassion.  But then I wish for a lot of things I know won't happen. 

I'm glad you come to the forum, even if we can't solve all your problems, you can at least give voice to your concerns and know you will not be judged, only supported and cared about as are our warriors. 

God Bless,   Anita

Holy cow! Did y'all see that? Kathy got mail from Philly to Dallas in 13 days! Kathy, thanks for the update, that's the fastest mail we've seen in two months! Shelly

  had to read that twice before it dawned on me that you meant the Dallas FOB, and not Dallas, Tx....  long week.  LOL  Though my live chat with Afghanistan this morning put a smile on my face for the whole day!  I told the guys I tried to put wings on the pkgs...  guess it worked!  Let's hope the mail stays at this speed (or faster)!    -Kathy

A few things I'd like to say tonight.   First off, on the issue of what is a "normal" parent reaction. I'm a clinical psychologist who spent 15 years in the VA treating combat vets with PTSD and doing research on PTSD.  My oldest son is in the Korengal with Viper Company.  There is no "normal" reaction for parents.  There are no "normal" reactions to abnormal situations outside normal human experience.  So whatever you feel and do is normal.  For you.  Whoever you are.  There may be some reactions that are more or less helpful to yourself or to your soldier.  But it's all normal.

Which leads me to the second thing I wanted to say.  I understand those who did not want to see the detail and the horror of what their sons are experiencing.  I, however very much needed to see it.  Seeing reality is an improvement for me on what I can imagine.  It helps me to know exactly what he's going through.  When I know what his days are like, I can be there with him and for him better.  And his mom at first did not want to know.  Now she wants to know and see it all.  She feels the same way I do, that knowing exactly what's going on makes it easier.

We're all different, all trying to find the best way to support our warriors out there and the best way to make it through this deployment ourselves.  I try to keep reminding myself it's a marathon, not a sprint.  We're only 3 months into a projected 15 month deployment, still a year to go. Going to work on not wearing myself out too early.

 And last, my two cents on the OPSEC issues related to the NBC News segments.  First, I most seriously doubt that either Capt. Howell or Col. Spitzer would have let anything go out that would have endangered our men.  Capt. Howell is a good guy, a good soldier, and a good officer whose life is on the line just like every other soldier in the valley.  Second, the kind of information available in the videos is available to anyone in the valley with binoculars, paper and pencil, and the ability to count. So I'd bet a reasonably large sum of money that the Taliban already knew everything they could have learned from those videos. 

I for myself am pleased that those who watched the NBC News segments now know what our sons are doing and at what cost. Freedom is not free.

Soldiersdad,

As a mom of a viper soldier I will have to agree with you about needing to see what my son is going through, to experience it with him. When I talk to him on the phone, I need to picture what he is doing so I can hold him closer to my heart. I haven't heard from Chris in a couple of weeks, but "I will pray him through it".  Hang in there all moms and dads, and adopted moms and dad, grandma's and grandpa's we will get through this together.

Angela

Soldiers dad,

I appreciate your opinion and your views on this television program.  I too was glad to see where my son spends most of his time. I treasure any pictures and words I can get from him.   But let me ask you this, was your son in the abandoned house that got hit with the motar?  Mine was.  Did you see your son in any of those videos?  I did. I had a hard time watching it and now having night mares.  I relieve this over and over.  Thinking it could have been my kid.  Well, my kid, by God's hand, he was one of the survivors. 

I knew about the fire fight and was able to work through what my son had been through.  He saw the death of one of his comrades.  My son is a great soldier and he is proud to represent America.  As a parent, this is very hard to see.  I know first hand that the Sgts. would not allow anything to be shone that would jeopardize our guys, but sir, I pray you will never have to see what I just saw.  I saw him being born, I don't want to see him die on television. 

So with all do respect, please understand that everyone on this forum has good intentions and love our boys.  Any feelings that are mentioned should not be critized but supported in the best way possible.  We are all feeling very vulnerable right now and scared.  We need to talk out our feelings. 

Thank you for your opinion.  May God Bless you!!

 Dianna

 Dianna,

 My post was meant to support all of us however we feel about what we want to see and know.  We all do it differently.  My deepest and sincerest apologies if you thought I meant to criticize.  My intent was the exact opposite. To say that we all have different ways of coping with the deployment of our children, and that whatever works for you is good.  Including talking out your feelings.  Certainly I'm all for that.

 And yes, I saw my son.  And he was on the mission though not in the house.  I'll share details of what he has been through with you in PM.

Soldiersdad & All,

I am a proud Army mom, and my son is at Vegas in the Korengal Valley.  I haven't heard from him since the last week in Sept.  As you can imagine, I have been quite worried.  I wanted to see anything I could to know where my son is, and what he is going through.  No, I didn't see him on the news coverage, and I am so sorry for the suffering that the other parent who did see her son is going through.  My heart is with you, one Army mom to another.  We all have our own ways of dealing, no ones better than anyone else's.  The great thing about this forum is you can say what you need to, and still get great support, I hope that will never end.

I am a realist, I want to know the good, the bad, and the ugly.  I hate to be kept in the dark, just tell me the truth, that's the way I want to live my life.  I hope I see Shawn in the PBS coverage, and if I do, and it's bad, then at least I will know how to deal with it.  The not knowing is the worst feeling, because you can imagine the worst possible things.

Thank you all for your support of our sons, our soldiers, our heroes!

Tamra

 Dianna, sent you a pm

hey all,

 re: Vegas

I did get email on 10/12 and 10/19 with 2 contacts from Vegas that were at the KOP to refit. They have been receiving mail, and were doing ok. their communications are still out. SO keep sending pkges and support, they are receiving it!

Hang in there Tamra!

Joanne