I'm sure all of you have the same issue.  I have a difficult time getting a soldier to tell me what they need.  They are polite.  Drives me crazy.  Do any of you have success in your letters?  How do you phrase the question?

 Maybe you could say, "I would like to know what you need, but if you feel like you are "asking" me for something, then maybe you would feel more comfortable posting it in your update on AnySoldier.  I really want to help you specifically, so please ask."

 I don't know but maybe this will help to think of something.  It really is a shame, but I know that many do not want to ask.  If they could only feel how much we want to help.

Good luck, if you figure it out, please let us all know.

"Do you want me to send you a bunch of stuff or something you really want?  I'd rather send what you want.  Either way, I'm sending you care packages!"  He did tell me a few things that they would like to have.  Granted I said this to my best friend's husband who's in Afghanistan so you may want to take a more gentle approach.

I thought I was the only one with this issue or my expectations were to high.  I've stated that I want to send packages through out their deployment and would like to know the items they like and don't want to send items they don't want.  Also stated they can just send a wish list, but all I get back is 'Thank You' and in some cases they do Thank me for specific items I included.  I do take the specific 'Thank You' as a request for more of that item.

 I did get one SSgt to tell me they wanted Easy Mac & single Spam, but that was just one out of about 30 boxes.  Hope one has the majic words to ask.

Anna

haha! You have to beat them over the head to let them know you want to help them! Great one, npg! I have had this same problem, and have no solution. I have had one group that does update their posts on this site, and say that they have enough of something, but could we send this other thing instead, but that is just one group and they never said anything to me directly.

If you find out a way to do it, you let us know!

Heidi

Thanks everyone.  Thats a good one npg.  I'll try that. 

Thats a good idea VickyV.  I'll try that too - encouraging them to be more detailed in their posts.

I like to give em choices, hey do you want your next box to be hygiene stuff or ez mac? Do you guys have a microwave, cause i have micro food or is ez mac better? Once they're willing to pick one, usually they're willing to throw in a hint too. I also say the same thing about help me send the things you really need/want. I joke around a lot that I'm going to start sending a checklist if i get one more "everything is great" hahaha I think they might just be scared of the checklist :) It's soooo much fun to shop for special requests and know you got a smile with your care package!

Hi spacecadet - your questions make me smile.  The males in my family never ask for anything. Consequently I have lots of practice at this.  So what have I learned:).  Not much!!!  Only been at it for several decades:)

Anyway - I've had pretty good luck with Little Debbie's as icebreakers - as long as I can actually get them into the shipping box:).  Devil Dogs for Marine contacts have gotten a pretty good reception.  Of course I try to throw in some healthy stuff and floss along with the snacks.

As far as asking, sometimes I'll ask if their Soldiers can use a particular kind of stuff.  They don't always have room or even time to use, so guess it just depends.  You might try reading posts of folks in similar situations to get an idea also - just a thought.

Good Luck.

Hola Dave!

This is a very good question and I'm glad I'm not alone in having this problem. I've sent check lists, scrawled notes on the inside flaps of the box, asked them in letters...I even have a tough time getting the contacts that email me daily  to tell me what they need/want. Once in a blue moon they'll "admit" they need something or twenty boxes later, someone will pipe up and say, "We really liked the Rice Krispy Treats..." which I of course, stopped putting in their boxes because I sent so many in the first few rounds I thought they'd want something different! [BTW...Rice Krispy Treats (16 count/box) is a good deal on Amazon if you get a monthly subscription...and they are fresh with a best by date a few months out.]

They always say thanks and that they've eaten their way through the box so I use that as a gauge that what I'm sending is useful. Yesterday, I received an email from a soldier in AFG exclaiming over the Sriracha hot sauce I sent. It's his favorite and I had no idea. Sigh. If you come up with a tactic to make them talk, please let the rest of us know!

Cheers!

Jen

I tried a checklist with our grandson because he wouldn't let us know what he would like from home, and it took him about 6 wks. to write back, but instead of using my checklist, he talked to his buddies and sent a list from their personal choices, which weren't too far from the list we sent.  For those young infantry guys in 2004-5, they liked chips and cheese in any form, M&Ms, plain or peanut, dry roasted peanuts, and Lifesavers more than anything else.  It's like pulling teeth to get most of them to give up what they want. 

We've all been trying to get these guys to be specific but it just doesn't work. I actually told my nephew to just tell me what he needed/missed, or his crazy aunt was going to pack a box full of weird stuff. It still didn't work. I have resorted to a "20 questions" kind of thing in e-mails and will usually get one or two questions answered. Good luck to you and everyone else. (By the way, a camp mirror was a big hit!)

I have had success in two ways.  With certain guys, usually ones who I have sent a couple of boxes to already, I tell them that I am going to spend my money to send them a box one way or the other.  They can tell me their preferences and get what they'd like to receive or they can get what I'd like to receive.  Either way I'm spending the money and would prefer them to get their choices. That usually gets a laugh and then a response about what they'd like.   The other way I get answers is to ask them what they miss from home.  So what snacks do you miss the most or what entertainment items do you miss?  That usually gives me enough info to get together some items they truly would like.

 Kathy

In hindsight I realize some of my favorite groups were chosen just because they didn't ask for anything. They'd post that they were beyond the wire, austere conditions, "but we're okay 'mam, just need your prayers". My boxes would get creative indeed. I particularly liked the thank you note received about having sent a box of adhesives: tan double-sided velcro straps, tan duct tape, black electrical tape, tan bungees, tan 401-cording & vanilla Oreos - trying to stay color-coordinated :) right after a box of bubbles, coloring books, colored pencils and beef jerky.  They taped sheets from the coloring books to a cardboard box that they'd labeled, "Mom's Reefer", and sent me a photo.  I put up the few coloring book sheets they had enclosedt on my refrigerator, put on my apron (so I really looked like "mom") and sent a photo back - it was swell.

Some fellows were specific in their postings, but best I've ever did in getting a request response from those who were not was in asking for guidance: "I'd like to send this, or that - what would be more useful?"   I hope your group will tell you true; good luck. 

 There are some great responses here. Esp. NPG! I tried the same approach.   Most times I don't get a response.  sigh. A few times I received a request  for items that were way beyond my pocketbook.

 Most times I include a note about my selections, telling them to pass the items along,  have a contest and give the  stuff to the loser<S> or use the things for target practice.   I keep it light,  and ask them to let me know if there is anything specific they would like.

I wonder though, if its maybe a mind set. If you start thinking of things you want you're going to lose the edge.  So you make do with what you do have.

We all do our best. and I am sure someone will benefit and receive a smile from our efforts.

Keep up the great job Folks!