(a friend forwarded this to me, I am not the author)
New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!
I am
over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down
terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've
got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off
to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit
until you're at least 35.
For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds Old guys
only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than
28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.
Young guys
haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a
dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and
hungry' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some a**h*le that
desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a
while.
An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys
always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm
tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up
killing some fanatical SOB.....
If captured we couldn't spill
the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank,
and serial number would be a real stretch.
Boot camp would
be easier for old guys.
We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft
food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using
them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the
screaming and yelling.
They could lighten up on the obstacle
course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot
wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups
after completing basic training.
Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.
An
18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to
shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't
figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the
back of his head.
These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.
Let us old
guys track down those dirty rotten coward
terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of
million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who
know that their best years are already behind them.
***How about recruiting Women over 50 .......with PMS/Menopause !!!
You
think Men have attitudes !!! Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my Lord!!! If nothing else,
put them on border patrol.....we will have it secured the first night!
Old guys
only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than
28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.